I’d Like to Buy an L!

–From Tanya Stankunas, Harvard Law School, Date of event: Spring 2003

We have an annual Moot Court competition at Harvard Law School for 1L’s in which we all have to write briefs and present oral arguments in teams of two. At the end of it all, our section of forty people, all of whom had worked on the same case, held the “1st Annual Ames Briefs Awards,” which consisted of several pairs of white men’s briefs, with categories written on them.

Among the many categories were: “Most Likely to Mention Starving Orphans in Her Brief,” “Looks Best in Briefs,” “Most Mentions of the George Foreman Grill in her Oral Argument,” and, last but not least, “The Pubic Safety Award,” given to the team whose first draft of their brief concerning the “public safety exception” to Miranda v. Arizona contained a slight typo …

Open Mouth, Insert Wingtip

–From Ray Pierce, University of Arkansas School of Law at Little Rock, Date of event: circa 2000

It’s the first night of class in Reasoning, Writing and Advocacy II (our legal writing course). The professor distributes to the class a tremendous amount of photocopied reading material handouts (about a 3 or 4-inch stack). Leaving class, buckling under the weight of the handouts, one of my classmates jokingly asks another when he planned to read all of the new materials. The student responded, “Hell, I never read any of the (expletive deleted) she gave us last semester.” At that point, he turned around to find none other than the diminutive writing professor standing behind him. “I guess I shouldn’t have said that,” he said meekly.

Andrew Jay McClurg is a law professor whose teaching and research interests include tort law, products liability, legal education, privacy law and firearms policy. He holds the Herbert Herff Chair of Excellence in Law at the University of Memphis Cecil C. Humphreys School of Law.
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Product Warning Labels
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Weird Patents
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Have fun and make the world a safer place. Send in pictures of dangerous conditions you stumble upon (figuratively only, we hope) out there in Tortland.

Legal Education
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Harmless Error
McClurg's twisted legal humor column ran for more than four years in the American Bar Association Journal.